简介
"This will be one of the most important books you've read in a long time." — --Larry King — "[Mayer's methodology] is martial. It's mental judo, where you use the other guy's energy to win. It's mind-set. It's charisma." — --The New York Times — "Two thumbs up! A whole new way of being smart about all the people in your life--coworkers, bosses, fami... more 籰y, the people you do business with. Bob Mayer tells you how to finesse the results you want without pleading, prodding, pushing, or pulling."
--Cuba Gooding, Jr., Academy Award-winning actor
"A tender and effective approach to tough problems. Mayer has written more than a book, it's a way of life."
--Robert Hudecek, retired CEO, Baskin-Robbins Ice Cream Co.
"Anybody can learn these methods, which range from recommendations to stay calm to suggestions on shaping your message. All are useful and presented in clear principles and vivid illustrations."
--Rolf Dobelli getabstract.com
The art of the argument. It's mysterious and powerful. It's the art of having things go your way. But it's also the art of getting out of your own way. It's having the Moves. But it's also about having the Touch. Welcome to the "new normal." It's a time and place where conversations are tougher, disagreements more frequent, consensus more difficult to find than ever before. This new world demands three new "right for our times" chapters:
"Heavy Metal Moves" and "Taboo Tactics": When you're being dissed, dismissed, and dumped on. Or when you need to break through.
"Waging Peace: The Mediation, Arbitration, and Collaborative Practice Game": Because there's more conflict but less money to hire litigation lawyers.
"The World Has Gotten Smaller": Learn to identify deep-rooted cultural differences, and how to act and react. ?less
目录
Introduction
Because you'll want to meet the blonde guy with the tuna melt and fries p. 11
Gain Absolute and Total Self-Control
Because winning begins by controlling how you will be p. 17
Construct a Consent Zone
Because people in the zone are less resistant and more receptive to you and your ideas p. 33
Link Inside the Consent Zone
Because people buy into trust first, ideas second p. 45
Lead Inside the Consent Zone
Because you don't push you lead p. 63
Create a Bulletproof Argument
Because winning requires "sounds right" reasoning p. 81
Know What to Say, When to Say It, and What Not to Say
Because every argument has slippery slopes p. 91
Assemble an Arsenal of Magic Words and Phrases
Because the way to win is to grab, hold, and convince p. 97
Craft Surgical Strike Questions
Because the other person's answers will be your desired outcome p. 105
Cinch Consent
Because it's now time to slam-dunk your win p. 111
Throw a "Hail Mary"
Because it's never over till it's over p. 131
Finesse Consent From Family and Friends
Because long-term relationships deserve special care and handling p. 141
Win the War of Words in Writing
Because sometimes writing your argument is the only way, and sometimes it's the winning way p. 147
Win the War of Words on the Telephone
Because it's becoming harder to travel across town p. 167
Win the War of Words With an Audience
Because someday soon you'll be arguing to an audience of a few or many p. 175
Win the War of Words at a Meeting
Because Ptas, neighborhoods, and offices love meetings p. 191
Heavy Metal Moves
Because they shape how others will act and react p. 197
Mediation, Arbitration, and Collaborative Dispute Resolution
Because the difference between justice and being right is called "legal fees" p. 209
Cross-Cultural Persuasion
Because the world gets smaller every day p. 225
Epilogue
Because now you're ready to win any argument p. 237
Notes p. 241
index p. 243
About the Author p. 249
Because you'll want to meet the blonde guy with the tuna melt and fries p. 11
Gain Absolute and Total Self-Control
Because winning begins by controlling how you will be p. 17
Construct a Consent Zone
Because people in the zone are less resistant and more receptive to you and your ideas p. 33
Link Inside the Consent Zone
Because people buy into trust first, ideas second p. 45
Lead Inside the Consent Zone
Because you don't push you lead p. 63
Create a Bulletproof Argument
Because winning requires "sounds right" reasoning p. 81
Know What to Say, When to Say It, and What Not to Say
Because every argument has slippery slopes p. 91
Assemble an Arsenal of Magic Words and Phrases
Because the way to win is to grab, hold, and convince p. 97
Craft Surgical Strike Questions
Because the other person's answers will be your desired outcome p. 105
Cinch Consent
Because it's now time to slam-dunk your win p. 111
Throw a "Hail Mary"
Because it's never over till it's over p. 131
Finesse Consent From Family and Friends
Because long-term relationships deserve special care and handling p. 141
Win the War of Words in Writing
Because sometimes writing your argument is the only way, and sometimes it's the winning way p. 147
Win the War of Words on the Telephone
Because it's becoming harder to travel across town p. 167
Win the War of Words With an Audience
Because someday soon you'll be arguing to an audience of a few or many p. 175
Win the War of Words at a Meeting
Because Ptas, neighborhoods, and offices love meetings p. 191
Heavy Metal Moves
Because they shape how others will act and react p. 197
Mediation, Arbitration, and Collaborative Dispute Resolution
Because the difference between justice and being right is called "legal fees" p. 209
Cross-Cultural Persuasion
Because the world gets smaller every day p. 225
Epilogue
Because now you're ready to win any argument p. 237
Notes p. 241
index p. 243
About the Author p. 249
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